It’s not easy to die to self. I used to be one of those people that kept a record of wrong (the opposite of 1 Corinthians 13:5, NIV), and would easily find the faults of others, without looking at how I acted or could have acted differently. As humans it’s easy to look at others and not ourselves. I think the root of most our problems is selfishness. We focus on how we’ve been hurt- it’s their fault, it’s their problem- and we don’t seek to die to self, to talk it out, forgive, apologize, and move on in peace.

Rick Warren said something to this affect on his visit to Berlin a few months ago: “God will try and change the negatives about your character. If you’re an unloving person, He will put unloving people around you so that you can become more loving. If you’re a difficult person, He will put difficult people around you so that you can become easier to get along with.”

The Almighty certainly gave me some scenarios like that in Berlin last year to break my record keeping of wrong, haha. I remember I was in a situation and I shared it with a friend of mine that was visiting Berlin. He told me that his father ALWAYS says, “I’m sorry,” even when a situation wasn’t his fault. I was floored! WHAT! This situation I was in didn’t require me to say I’m sorry. I was the one that should have received the apology, I thought. But my friend’s father has a point, which is deeply rooted in humility. While we can’t (always) go around apologizing for something we didn’t do, we have to pick our battles. There was certainly a path of peace that I could have taken and my record keeping would have exacerbated the situation, so I went with peace.

“Be selective in your battles, sometimes peace is better than being right.”

-Nicky Gumbel

Why the need to die to self? Because selfishness can lead to a feeling of entitlement, which is pride, which is bad character and a sin- which can easily lead to breaking any of the 10 Commandments and possibly a destroyed broken life (but that’s like worse case scenario).

Dying to self is hard but it’s the only way to combat keeping a record of someone’s wrongs and all other forms of selfishness. It’s time that we grow up! God will place the right people in our lives at the right time to reposition our hearts in areas that need repositioning. We must start our day everyday by submitting to God and renew our minds (Romans 12:2) to be able to die to self, and ask Jesus to help us do such a thing. It’s not easy but it’s better to die to self than to be selfish, immature, and an unforgiving person.

Happy Friday, Warmly, & In His grip, Ally